The Nut Job

The Nut Job - Dir. Peter Lepeniotis (2014)

The first few months of the year are considered a dumping ground for studios who generally release subpar titles with very little fanfare. The winter can also be slim pickings when it comes to family friendly entertainment. In 2013, Dreamworks capitalized on the slow market with The Croods, a gorgeously animated picture that went on to do over $587 million at the box office. There's no such luck this year as parents would have to settle for taking their kids to see The Nut Job.

Set during the 1950's, The Nut Job follows one Surly (Will Arnett), a misanthropic squirrel who only looks out for himself. Surly's only friend is Buddy (Robert Tinkler), a rat who looks like a grungy and emaciated version of Remy from Ratatouille. None of the other animals in picturesque Liberty Park like him though Andie (Katherine Heigl) seems to be slightly sympathetic. Autumn is nearly over, but the food supply is short for the coming winter. Andie and the exceedingly heroic Grayson (Brendan Fraser) clash with Surly over the nuts from a vendor cart. Their argument accidentally ignites the propane tank and burns down the tree that everyone calls home. Under the stern leadership of Raccoon (Liam Neeson), the animals vote to banish Surly from the park.

Surly and Buddy are left to fend for themselves in the big city against pigeons and sewer rats. As luck would have it, they stumble upon a nut store with a bountiful supply to feed them for ages to come. The store happens to be the staging ground for a quartet of gangsters led by King (Stephen Lang). Their plan is to tunnel into the nearby bank and replace all the bags of money with sacks full of nuts so no one will notice the cash is missing. Surly and the other park animals forge an uneasy alliance to gather the nuts and avoid detection by the humans.

The Nut Job has a clever premise with a bank heist concurrent to the cute critters pulling off one of their own in the background. The filmmakers certainly aimed high by attempting to imbue the manic energy of the classic Looney Tunes shorts with an allegory straight out of Animal Farm. However, the movie never lives up to those lofty goals. The script suffers from the same lazy pitfalls of other second-rate animated flicks, riddled with fart jokes and contrived pop culture references. Angry Birds? Seriously? Despite being a period piece, The Nut Job prominently features the novelty hit "Gangnam Style." Its familiar techno beats play over a celebratory sequence during the film and an animated version of PSY pops up during the end credits for the requisite dance party. Perhaps, it was included because Nut Job was co-produced by a South Korean studio. In any event, the song's popularity died out long before "Nut Job" saw the light of day and was buried alongside other one-hit wonders like the Macarena and "Whoomp! (There It Is)."

It also seems like the writers couldn't be bothered with creating names for every character. Well, this squirrel is surly, so let's call him Surly. What about his buddy? Buddy. And the raccoon and mole? Raccoon and Mole. Job well done.

The Nut Job was budgeted at $42.8 million, which is a fraction of what Pixar works with, but other studios have done much better animation with not much more. Disney's knockoff Planes looks worlds better than Nut Job on a budget of $50, despite a screenplay that was just as uninspired. The movie is certainly colorful, but the designs and the movements appear to have been animated a decade ago.

If anyone was expecting the celebrity cast to bring some sparkle to the proceedings, you will be disappointed. Aside from the baritone voices of Will Arnett and Liam Neeson, none of them are recognizable and only Maya Rudolph as an affectionate pug has any charm.

The concept of The Nut Job is a bit similar to 2006's Over the Hedge, which shared a co-writer in Lorne Cameron. None of the furry fauna in either movie were all that memorable. Even the zany interludes of Scrat from the Ice Age series were more fun. As Pixar has done again and again, you can create an animated film with enough intelligence and heart to appeal to adults and children alike. The Nut Job might win over the youngest of age, but it will make others fall into an early hibernation.

Rating: * (*****)

Knights of Badassdom

Knights of Badassdom - Dir. Joe Lynch (2014)

Knights of Badassdom started gaining buzz when it premiered its trailer during a panel at Comic-Con 2011. The majority of attendees had no awareness of the indie film though some ears perked at the presence of fan favorites like Peter Dinklage (Game of Thrones), Danny Pudi (Community), and Summer Glau (Serenity). The footage received a rousing reaction from the exact demographics the movie was hoping to hit. Unfortunately, Knights has been sitting on the shelf until now thanks to Entertainment One, who are releasing it on DVD & Blu-ray. Disagreements between director Joe Lynch and the producers over final cut led to the delay. After viewing Knights, I'm not so sure if Lynch's version would have been a significant improvement.

Knights is set in the world of LARPing that's Live Action Role-Playing for the uninitiated. Friendly folks do battle in a medieval fantasy world with a little help from some foam weapons and a wealth of imagination. Joe (Ryan Kwanten) used to be a LARPer as well as a master of Dungeons & Dragons. He once gave Ronny Kwok's (Jimmi Simpson) paladin a serious case of demonic syphilis. Nowadays, Joe is an aspiring musician, specializing in doom metal, while working a day job as an auto mechanic. That's not enough for his girlfriend, Beth (Margarita Levieva), who wants a boyfriend with some iota of ambition. Joe gets dumped in humiliating fashion and copes by getting stoned with his best friends Eric (Steve Zahn) and Hung (Dinklage). He awakens the next morning in armor and finds a horde of LARPers preparing for the Battle of Evermore.

Joe reluctantly joins in, but the games become far too real when Eric unknowingly reads from a magical tome with actual supernatural origins. Eric summons a bloodthirsty succubus that looks exactly like Beth and starts killing LARPers one by one.

One of the problems with Knights is Ryan Kwanten. It's not that the Aussie actor gives a bad performance; he's perfectly fine and feels like a natural fit. However, his character is one of the least interesting in the picture and he doesn't have the screen presence of his co-stars. When you're in there with Peter Dinklage, you need a load of charisma just to stand out. Dinklage (who also served as an executive producer) is one of the highlights as he essentially parodies Tyrion Lannister. He's brash and extremely enthusiastic about the whole venture. Zahn and Jimmi Simpson, as the fussy gamesmaster, are also quite funny in their supporting roles. Glau joins the fray as the guild's lone female, Gwen, who started LARPing in order to look after her cousin Gunther (Brett Gipson), an Ivan Dragon lookalike who remains in character 24/7.

You can't fault any of the actors, many of whom are in the movie far too briefly, for Knights being something of a slog. The story starts off promisingly enough, but loses traction at the midpoint. It's as if screenwriters Kevin Dreyfuss and Matt Wall just ran out of material. So, we wind up with repetitive sequences in which nothing of important actually happens. There's also an awkward blend of horror and comedy where the filmmakers are clearly inspired by Evil Dead with the goofy humor of Renaissance fair speak. At least, Knights treats its subjects with respect and never truly ridicules the subculture.

Considering the limited budget, you would think those involved would be more innovative with the gore and special effects. Instead, they rely on chintzy CGI that doesn't look at all convincing and a final act monster looks absolutely ridiculous.

Knights of Badassdom was an eagerly anticipated release, but when the time came the movie failed to deliver. Not even the winning cast is enough to elevate the lackluster material into a film worth recommending.

Rating: * ½ (*****)

Welcome to the Jungle

Welcome to the Jungle - Dir. Rob Meltzer (2014)

From the late-80-'s to the mid-90's, Jean-Claude Van Damme was a box office draw who was able to knock out the competition with a swift roundhouse kick. However, his clout slowly started to fizzle away until he fell into the almost inescapable limbo of the direct-to-video market. Lately, he's been stretching those muscles from Brussels in an effort to regain his relevance. Van Damme played himself in the reflexive JCVD, which earned him critical praise and was his first theatrical release in almost a decade. He had a really enjoyable turn as the subtly named Jean Vilain in The Expendables 2. Even some of his recent DTV projects have been out of his comfort zone. Universal Soldier: Day of Reckoning was a dark and bizarre take on the franchise that was more akin to David Cronenberg or Gaspar Noé.

Van Damme has never really tried his hand at comedy before, aside from a brief cameo in Last Action Hero and the unintentional laughs of the much-maligned Street Fighter. This time around, Van Damme does the splits and dives deep into the genre with Welcome to the Jungle, which has aspirations at being Office Space with a dash of Lord of the Flies.

Adam Brody is Chris, a timid graphic designer at a big advertising firm where he's constantly pushed around by the odious Phil (Rob Huebel). Phil steals one of Chris's designs for a toilet paper campaign, yet the poor kid still can't muster up the courage to stand up for himself. Meanwhile, their incompetent boss, Mr. Crawford (Dennis Haysbert), won't do anything about it. Instead, he announces that all employees will take part in a team-building exercise on a remote island under the supervision of Navy Seal Storm Rothchild. The trip goes terribly wrong when the pilot is found dead and Rothchild is mauled by a tiger.

These white collar goofs are completely clueless until Chris teaches them survival skills he learned as a Boy Scout. Phil grows insanely jealous of Chris suddenly becoming the new alpha male and begins undermining all his orders. Using a hallucinogenic weed, Phil turns nearly everyone into an obedient savage with himself as their god. Chris escapes along with a small group consisting of best friend Jared (Eric Edelstein), the rabbit-obsessed Brenda (Kristen Schaal), and Lisa (Megan Boone from NBC's The Blacklist), the pretty girl from HR that Chris has long had a crush on.

Van Damme takes center stage in the posters and cover art in spite of his relatively small role. It's still justified as JCVD happens to be the only entertaining part of the movie as he pokes fun at his own tough guy image. Outside of Van Damme, Welcome to the Jungle labors to elicit a single chuckle or smirk in its thankfully brief 95 minute runtime. It desperately grasps for humor with repetitive and lazy jokes about gays and masturbation. All the characters are cartoons with the exception of Chris and Lisa, who are about as white bread as can be.

The Rundown, starring Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson and Seann William Scott, was previously titled Welcome to the Jungle. I only point this out because that is a far better film than this painfully dull attempt at comedy. You could also do better by listening to the Guns 'N' Roses song over and over for an hour and a half.

Rating: * (*****)