Men in Black III

Men in Black III - Dir. Barry Sonnenfeld (2012)

The Avengers has been an unstoppable juggernaut since its release on May 4^th. There was only one super-powered being capable of knocking Marvel's magnum opus off its box office perch and that would be Will Smith. The former Fresh Prince is a guaranteed draw though I'm sure everyone would like to forget about Wild Wild West. But, Smith hasn't starred in a film since 2008's overwrought Seven Pounds and it's been a decade since the forgettable Men in Black II. Smith and Tommy Lee Jones slip comfortably back into the suits and sunglasses for a $55 million Memorial Day opening.

An intergalactic biker assassin named Boris the Animal (Jemaine Clement) has escaped from a maximum security prison on the Moon. Agent K (Jones) was the one who not only apprehended Boris, but blew off his left arm back in 1969. K also thwarted an invasion by Boris's people, the Boglodites, which lead to their extinction. Boris plans to travel back in time and prevent all this from happening. Agent J (Smith) literally jumps back to the 60's by leaping off the Chrysler Building to team up with the younger K (Josh Brolin).

Men in Black III was making headlines within the industry for the all the wrong reasons. The script by Etan Cohen (Tropic Thunder) went through multiple drafts by David Koepp and Jeff Nathanson, both of whom went uncredited. This is nothing new for a big budget blockbuster, but going into production without a completed screenplay is a rarity. With only the first act set in stone, MIB3 went into production in the fall of 2010 to take advantage of lucrative NY tax breaks that were feared to expire by the end of the year. A scheduled two month break was stretched to three as the rewrite process dragged on while some crew members continued to be paid. All told the budget was rumored to have ballooned to $300 million.

After viewing Men in Black III, it is clear the beleaguered writing process took its toll on the threequel, which is rife with plot holes. The fact that J still remembers the proper timeline is glanced over with a single line. Yet, it's never explained how J is with MIB since the man who recruited him no longer exists or why the aliens waited forty years to invade the Earth. MIB3 rehashes the fish out of water story from the previous installments as J deals the culture shock of the 60's. Don't expect any deep contemplation about Vietnam or political turmoil. Race relations are dealt with in an amusing sequence where J is pulled over by a pair of prejudiced cops. J is also befuddled by the primitive technology employed by the department back in the day. The 60's section is where the film shines thanks to the retro-futuristic production design by Bo Welch and the practical effects by make-up wizard Rick Baker, who was obviously inspired by the drive-in classics of the yesteryear. But, inconsistency raises its ugly head once more. The MIB are hampered by portable neuralizers attached to cumbersome battery packs and clunky looking jetpacks. Yet, they utilize gyroscopic monocycles that resemble the 'It' from South Park that would still be considered high tech in the future. While K's stoic demeanor has been an accepted personality trait, the filmmakers saw a ridiculous need to explain how he became this way. Never mind that K had lighthearted moments in the other pictures. Thus, the film builds to a final denouement that makes little sense.

One of the reasons the original Men in Black succeeded was the chemistry between the smart alecky Will Smith and the straight laced Tommy Lee Jones. Here, Jones is reduced to an extended cameo with the bulk of the picture shouldered by Josh Brolin, who does an uncanny impersonation of No Country for Old Men co-star. Brolin's vocal mimicry is so good you'd swear they dubbed Jones's voice over his. Bill Hader brings a much needed breath of fresh air as Andy Warhol, who happens to be an undercover MIB agent. A spinoff featuring the adventures of K and W in the seventies would have been more interesting than what we actually get. Will Smith is in full quippy Will Smith mode even if some of his humor ("I got no problem pimp slapping the shiznit out of Andy Warhol.") is as outdated as the vintage MIB gadgets. My goodness, he doesn't even sing a goofy theme song.  Luckily, the movie has a strong villain in Jemaine Clement from Flight of the Conchords. It helps that speaks like Tim Curry and looks like "Macho Man" Randy Savage. Michael Stuhlbarg is also a great addition to the franchise as a nebbish extraterrestrial with the unique ability to see all possible timelines.

The perfect sequel should feel like a necessary continuation of the series along with whetting the appetite for further films. Men in Black III didn't need to be made and didn't make me clamor for Men in Black IV. If you can look past a plot rife with clichés and plot holes, you'll find an acceptable piece of popcorn entertainment. The demographic that will enjoy Men in Black III the most will likely be the kids who weren't even born when the first picture hit the screens.

Rating: ** ½ (*****)

Battleship

Battleship - Dir. Peter Berg (2012)

The idea of adapting a board game into a movie isn't unprecedented. In 1985, Paramount turned Clue into a comedic mystery that cleverly used multiple endings. While it did poorly at the box office, Clue has built up a cult audience due to home video and cable TV airings. Still, it seems like the studios are running short of ideas if they're turning to old board games for concepts. Monopoly is in development, Adam Sandler is attached to produce and star in Candyland, and Universal wants to turn Ouija into a low-budget horror film ala Paranormal Activity. I suppose it's only a matter of time before they make Hungry Hungry Hippos as a white knuckle jungle adventure or Operation as a gripping hospital drama. Until Connect Four: The Movie hits theaters nationwide, Universal and Hasbro have teamed up bring us Battleship.

Taylor Kitsch, in his second blockbuster of the year, stars as Alex Hopper, a professional screw-up, who gets in trouble with the law after breaking into a convenience store for a frozen chicken burrito. Why in the world would he do that? To impress the lovely Brooklyn Decker, who plays a physical therapist named Samantha Shane, the daughter of a stern Admiral (Liam Neeson) in the U.S. Navy. Admiral Shane also happens to be the commanding officer of Alex's older brother, Stone (Alexander Skarsgard). Stone forces his younger sibling to enlist in the Navy in the hopes they will straighten him out.

Years pass and the Hopper Brothers are stationed off the coast of Hawaii where they are to participate in a war games exercise with a Japanese fleet. The simulation turns deathly real with the arrival of alien scout ships that have followed NASA transmissions back to Earth. The extraterrestrial invaders sink two ships and erect an impenetrable force field around a section of the sea. Only the USS John Paul Jones is left with Alex assuming command as all other senior officers have been killed. Meanwhile, another squad of aliens is building a communications array on the mainland to contact their home planet. The only humans able to stop them are a nerdy NASA scientist (Hamish Linklater), Samantha, and one of her patients, Lt. Col. Canales, played by war vet and real-life amputee Gregory D. Gadson.

"From the studio that brought you Transformers," has been utilized prominently in the film's marketing campaign. The phrase is fitting because Battleship seems to have sprung from the mind of Michael Bay. Every aspect of Battleship has a Bay-esque feel to it, from the production design to the sound effects. The filmmakers even brought on Steve Jablonsky, who scored the Transformers series, to score Battleship. The aliens' spacecraft and weaponry look like they were bought from a Decepticon garage sale. Director Peter Berg shoots his action sequences with the same frenzied, kinetic pace as Bay. Scenes of massive urban destruction appear to have been pulled directly from Armageddon. At least, Battleship isn't replete with the misogyny and racial stereotypes generally found in Bay productions. The script by Erich & Jon Hoeber (who also wrote Whiteout and Red) is riddled with plot holes, a leaky vessel to use nautical parlance. The aliens knock out the Navy's communications and radar with an electromagnetic pulse, yet the crew still has access to digital monitors and other electronic devices. The screenplay isn't subtle either as it constantly hammers home how Alex is full of wasted potential.

The main reason to knock out the radar is to allow the filmmakers to incorporate the hit-and-miss strategy of the original game. The crew of the John Paul Jones utilizes buoys to create a grid in order to detect where the enemy ships are. The aliens also use missiles made to look like the game pegs. Sadly, no one utters the catchphrase, "You sunk my battleship." Though one character does say, "No one's gonna sink this battleship." The aliens themselves are pulled off in an interesting manner. They are humanoid with a convenient weakness, but have clear rules of engagement

Kitsch isn't as leaden here as he was in John Carter, maybe because he's able to play it a little looser. Still, you can't help but wonder how the film would have unfolded had Alexander Skarsgard been cast in the lead. Fans of Friday Night Lights will be pleased to see Kitsch reunited with former castmate Jesse Plemons as the requisite comic relief sidekick, a role also taken by Hamish Linklater. Pop sensation Rihanna makes her acting debut as a scrappy weapons specialist, a role usually reserved for Michelle Rodriguez. She does fine in the limited role and gets one of the movie's best lines ("Mahalo, motherfucker.") Meanwhile, Liam Neeson is wasted in a throwaway part though I'm sure he got a nice, fat paycheck.

Battleship is everything audiences have come to expect from a summer blockbuster: loud, dumb, and full of expensive special effects. Taken on that level, it may be enjoyable to those looking for simple, escapist fun.

Rating: ** (*****)

John Carter

John Carter - Dir. Andrew Stanton (2012)

"When I saw you, I believed it was a sign that something new can come into this world."

Edgar Rice Burroughs is famed for writing two classic adventure novels, Tarzan of the Apes and A Princess of Mars. Tarzan became more familiar across the spectrum of pop culture while A Princess of Mars, the first in Burroughs' Barsoom series, became a progenitor of 20^th century sci-fi and fantasy. The name of its lead protagonist, John Carter, a Civil War soldier mysteriously transported to Mars, will resonate with genre fans. Sadly, that same name is now synonymous with one of the biggest box office disasters in movie history.

An adaptation of A Princess of Mars had been in development for decades as far back as 1931 when Bob Clampett of Looney Tunes fame pitched the idea of an animated version to Burroughs. In 2004, Robert Rodriguez was attached to direct a live-action film at Paramount with Frank Frazetta as conceptual artist. The project passed through the hands of Kerry Conron, the writer/director of Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow, and Jon Favreau, who ultimately abandoned the picture to helm Iron Man. The rights passed back to Disney, who previously held them back in the 80's. Pixar's Andrew Stanton (Finding Nemo, Wall-E), a die-hard fan of the books, enthusiastically stepped into the director's chair and co-wrote the screenplay with fellow Pixar employee Mark Andrews and Pulitzer Prize-winning novelist Michael Chabon.

Another Pixar peer, Brad Bird, knocked it out of the park when he made his live-action debut with Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol, which had been released four months earlier. But, Stanton found himself well outside his comfort zone, requiring extensive reshoots for the troubled production. Negative buzz built around the film with the budget estimated to be $250 million with a marketing campaign rumored to add another $100 million on top of that. That same marketing campaign did nothing to stave off the negative buzz that was quickly building. Stanton stubbornly took charge of the advertising that included lackluster posters and uneventful trailers. The generic title didn't help matters either. A Princess of Mars became John Carter of Mars to distance itself from being a frilly girls' movie. Mars was eventually ditched because movies with the word 'Mars' in their title did poorly. Disney was still reeling from another monumental flop in Mars Needs Moms, which led to the shutdown of Robert Zemeckis' ImageMovers Digital and the cancellation of his planned 3D remake of Yellow Submarine. Thus, we were left with plain old John Carter, which makes the whole thing sound like the story of Jimmy Carter's cousin who works as a CPA.

No, John Carter (Taylor Kitsch) is a former captain in the Confederate Army now mining for gold in the Arizona desert. While being press ganged into a Union regiment by Col. Powell (Bryan Cranston), they are ambushed by the Apache. Carter seeks refuge in a cave where he somehow wakes up on Mars, which the natives refer to as Barsoom. Due to the lower gravity, Carter is blessed with superior strength and the ability to leap great distances. He is taken prisoner by the Tharks, a tribe of green skinned, multi-limbed Martians, led by Tars Tarkas (Willem Dafoe). Carter is soon pulled into a war between red skinned humans from the cities of Helium and Zodanga. The peaceful city of Helium is led Tardos Mors (Ciarán Hinds) and his daughter, the titular princess of Mars, Dejah Thoris (Lynn Collins). The Zodangans follow the ruthless Sab Than (Dominic West), who wields a powerful force known as the 9^th Ray given to him by clandestine beings known as Therns, led by Matai Shang (Mark Strong).

John Carter may have been cursed with being too faithful to the source material. There is an inordinate amount of plot to wade through as the film laboriously details the entire geopolitical history of the planet. It doesn't help that you need a scorecard to keep track of all the characters with their hard to remember names. Secondly, Stanton does little to differentiate John Carter from other sci-fi spectacles of recent years. While the original book may have spawned Avatar and Star Wars, in the eyes of the general public, John Carter looks like a rip-off. It has the same storyline about an Earthling saving an alien race, a gladiatorial battle recalling one from Attack of the Clones, and speeder bikes ala Return of the Jedi. Worse yet, its mix of science fiction and Western elements is superficially reminiscent of Cowboys & Aliens with a hero, who looks too much like the one from Prince of Persia, both big budget failures no one should associate with.

Taylor Kitsch has received a huge push as a leading man in 2012. While he's given fine performances as Tim Riggins on Friday Night Lights, he's little more than a bland hunk of meat as John Carter. Lynn Collins fares better as her Dejah Thoris is more than just a scantily-clad princess; she is a scholar and a warrior. It's easy to see why Collins jumped to the forefront as a possible candidate to play Wonder Woman. But, the best character by far happens to be Woola, a swift six-legged beast resembling a cross between a bulldog and a lizard. It says a lot when a CGI creation is far more interesting than any living, breathing human being.

Disney made headlines when it posted a $200 million loss on the production of John Carter with Walt Disney Studios' head Rich Ross resigning a month later. John Carter doesn't deserve to be placed alongside notorious bombs like Ishtar or Heaven's Gate. It has the tone of old school adventure serials with a strong opening in which Stanton emulates John Ford and Sergio Leone. John Carter ultimately lacks the sense of wonder and majesty necessary to make it a sci-fi classic.

Rating: ** ½ (*****)

W.E.

W.E. - Dir. Madonna (2011)

"I have never known one person so utterly possessed by another as he was by her."

Madonna has made an indelible mark on pop culture as one of the most successful pop singers of all time. Yet, she was never able to achieve the same success in the film industry, despite her larger-than-life stage persona. Though she appeared in hit films like Dick Tracy and A League of Their Own, Madonna will be inexorably linked to critically derided flops like Body of Evidence and Swept Away, directed by her then-husband Guy Ritchie. With acting not panning out, Madonna decided to try her luck behind the camera and made her directorial debut with 2008's Filth and Wisdom. A dark comedy set in a world of S&M, strip clubs, and drug addicts; it also received poor reviews from the critics.

After going for seedy and shocking, Madonna tries to court the highbrow arthouse audience with her sophomore effort, W.E. The film is based on the controversial love affair between King Edward VIII and a twice-divorced American named Wallis Simpson. Their relationship was glimpsed partly in The King's Speech as Edward abdicated the throne in order to marry Wallis, much to the dismay of the royal family and an entire country. The couple was also dogged by rumors of being Nazi sympathizers after visiting Hitler in 1937. Madonna herself had been fascinated by their story for years, relating how the very mention of their name at a soiree was like throwing a Molotov cocktail into the room.

Rather than tell a straight biopic about Wallis Simpson, Madonna relates her story through the struggles of a young socialite in 1998. Wally Winthrop (Abbie Cornish) seems to have a life little girls dream about. She's married to a successful doctor and lives in a ritzy apartment in Manhattan. Yet, Wally is unsuccessful in her attempts to get pregnant. Even worse, her husband, William (Richard Coyle), no longer desires to have children and becomes physically and mentally abusive. Wally becomes obsessed with her namesake when a collection of personal items belonging to Edward and Wallis are put up for auction at Sotheby's. There, Wally becomes friends with a Russian security guard named Evgeni (Oscar Isaac), who happens to be the sensitive type that plays Rachmaninoff on the piano. Madonna intercuts Wally's plights with those of Wallis (Andrea Riseborough), who suffered abuse at the hands of her first husband before leaving her second husband for Edward (James D'Arcy). Despite the love they share, the royal family refuses to accept Wallis.

It's clear why Madonna chose to tell the story of Wallis and Edward from the point-of-view of Wallis. Both women have seen their marriages become tabloid fodder and both have spent their lives fending off paparazzi and unwanted publicity. However, the screenplay by Madonna and Alek Keshishian, the director of her hit documentary Truth or Dare, lacks any sort of subtlety as evidenced by an opening sequence where a naked and pregnant Wallis is brutally beaten on a bathroom floor and left in a pool of blood. Worse yet, it's exceedingly dull with an endless stream of mopey melodrama. Then, W.E. gets downright laughable when the heroines cross space and time to share furtive glances and fortune cookie platitudes. Another sequence sees a dour party thrown by the controversial couple turned into a drug fueled rave as the dapper denizens trip out on Benzedrine. The anachronistic "Pretty Vacant" by the Sex Pistols plays over the sequence, which seems to contradict Madonna's hypothesis that Wallis was a woman of unsung substance.

When the film isn't muddled by Madonna's messy direction, it actually looks pretty good thanks to the production design by Martin Childs (Shakespeare in Love) and the costumes by Arianne Phillips (A Single Man), both of whom are Oscar winners. Andrea Riseborough makes a fine accounting for herself in the role of Wallis Simpson. Strong and opinionated, it's easy to see why someone might give up an empire for her. Too bad she wasn't given better material to work with. It's also a shame that none of the other actors give any sort of a memorable performance. Abbie Cornish, James D'Arcy, and Oscar Isaac are all bland while the father-son duo of James and Laurence Fox (who play King George V and the stuttering Bertie) deserved more screen time.

Madonna may have left her mark in the music industry, but she has yet to make an admirable impression in her nascent career as a director. W.E. is plagued by questionable editing, unsightly scene composition, and a script that is a downright bore.

Rating: * (*****)

Safe

Safe - Dir. Boaz Yakin (2012)

"You got some balls, Luke."

"Yeah, amazing I can even walk."

If you want to get me to fork over my ticket money, all you need are two simple words: Jason Statham. The British butt kicker isn't a classically trained Shakespearean thespian, but he does possess a strong screen presence that makes him one of few actors capable of being a top action star. Safe is the latest entry in Statham's oeuvre, a gritty action flick set in the New York underworld. Safe was written and directed by Boaz Yakin, whose diverse previous efforts as director have been Remember the Titans and Uptown Girls. His writing credits include Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights, Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time, and The Punisher. Not the Thomas Jane one, but the Dolph Lundgren version from 1989. That last picture is probably the closest in tone to Safe.

Statham plays Luke Wright, a homeless bum who was once an MMA fighter and before that a top cop in the NYPD. His life has gone downhill ever since the Russian mob murdered his wife after botching a fixed fight. Things change when Luke spots his wife's killer as they pursue a young girl named Mei (Catherine Chan) through the subway. Mei is a math prodigy grabbed off the streets of China by the Triads and put to work as a human computer for Han Jiao (James Hong). Mei and Luke are eventually embroiled in a turf war between the Chinese and the Russians, both of whom are after a coded sequence the girl has memorized, which will lead to a hidden cache of money. There's also a team of crooked police detectives, former comrades of Luke's with connections to the mayor (Chris Sarandon), looking to cash in as well. Luke pulls a Yojimbo and attempts to play all three sides in an effort to protect Mei and redeem himself.

If you've seen one Jason Statham movie, you've seen them all. Safe doesn't do much to distinguish itself from The Mechanic, Killer Elite, or any of the Transporter movies. The only surprising element in Safe is the fact that former Devo frontman Mark Mothersbaugh composed the score. Yakin isn't a spectacular action director, but he doesn't lean on the shaky camera and quick editing that the majority of American directors overuse. Yakin devotes the first half hour of Safe for the setup, taking his time to introduce a plethora of characters and subplots. Front loading the movie turns out to be a shrewd choice as it saves all the mayhem for the second and third acts. For nearly an hour, Statham embarks on a path of righteous fury, engaging in violent shootouts and fisticuffs. There's a close combat fight sequence on a subway train and chaotic carnage at a trendy restaurant with Statham suplexing a man through a table.

The relationship between Luke and Mei borrows a little from Luc Besson's Leon though Catherine Chan is no Natalie Portman. Safe has more in common with the current crop of action flicks churned out by the Besson machine with its leaden dialogue and by-the-numbers plot. If not for Jason Statham, Safe would have been relegated to forgettable, direct-to-video status.

Rating: ** ½ (*****)

Dark Shadows

Dark Shadows - Dir. Tim Burton (2012)

Johnny Depp and Tim Burton are almost synonymous with each other. Their partnership as actor and director have resulted in great films like Edward Scissorhands and Ed Wood. Recently, Depp and Burton's efforts have been hit and miss. While I enjoyed Corpse Bride and Sweeney Todd, their version of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory left much to be desired and lacked the charms of the Gene Wilder film. Alice in Wonderland was a soulless exercise in stylized CGI, despite the fact that it made over a billion dollars at the box office. For their eighth film together, Depp and Burton have chosen to remake Dark Shadows, an ABC soap opera that aired between 1966 and 1971. It's been a passion project for the two as both were huge fans of the series. The original Dark Shadows was a low-rated daytime program until it introduced the character of Barnabas Collins, an ageless vampire played by Jonathan Frid. Afterwards, the show became a cult classic and a staple of the early Sci-Fi Channel.

Frid recently passed away in April, but not before filming a cameo in the picture alongside several former cast members.

Succeeding him in the role is Johnny Depp, who recounts his tale of woe in the opening prologue. Beginning in the late-1700's, the Collins family emigrates from Liverpool, England to Maine where they found the seaside city of Collinsport and a successful fishing business. All is well for Barnabas until he spurns the love of servant girl, Angelique (Eva Green), for chaste Josette (Bella Heathcote). Angelique places a curse on them, causing Josette to jump off a cliff and turn Barnabas into a vampire. The townspeople lock him into a casket and bury him alive for nearly two hundred years when some unsuspecting construction workers release him.

Awakening in 1972, Barnabas is confounded by fashion, automobiles, and the Carpenters. His beloved Collinwood manor has fallen into disrepair as have his descendents. Matriarch Elizabeth Collins Stoddard (Michelle Pfeiffer) struggles to keep the family business afloat and control her rebellious teenage daughter Carolyn (Chloe Grace Moretz). Elizabeth's shiftless brother, Roger (Jonny Lee Miller), spends most his days stealing from his relatives and womanizing. Roger's son, David (Gulliver McGrath), has been withdrawn ever since his mother's death years ago. The family has a live-in psychiatrist, Dr. Hoffman (Helena Bonham Carter), to help him cope though she's made no progress at all. The Collins family has also hired a new governess for the boy in Victoria Winters (also Heathcote), who is the spitting image of Barnabas's lost paramour. Rounding out the Collins household is Jackie Earle Haley as Willie Loomis, a drunken caretaker who looks like he previously worked at the Overlook Hotel.

Barnabas is shocked to discover that Angelique is still alive, having transformed herself into a pillar of the community having founded a rival fishing cannery. She has vowed to win Barnabas's love or destroy him.

As one would expect from a Tim Burton film, Dark Shadows features visually stunning costumes and production design. It's all captured handsomely by cinematographer Bruno Delbonnel, who previously shot Jean-Pierre Jeunet's Amelie and A Very Long Engagement. The gothic atmosphere makes Dark Shadows seem like Beetlejuice with a budget, except it lacks any of the allure or originality of Burton's classic comedy. The fault lies within the scattershot screenplay by John August, which was rewritten by Seth Grahame-Smith, the author of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies and Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter. It's as if Grahame-Smith and Burton decided to cram several seasons' worth of storylines into a single movie.

Following the prologue, the film opens with Victoria's narration as she arrives in Collinsport by train. Logically, she should a main character and serve as the audience's point-of-view, instead she disappears for nearly forty minutes. She pops in and out of the third act with the love story addressed at the last minute. The same goes for Barnabas's relationship with David. It's said that David looks up to the immortal one, but none of that comes out because they only share one or two scenes together. The writers focus more time on how silly the 70's were with lazy gags about lava lamps and dirty hippies though there is a funny joke involving a McDonald's sign. The score by the great Danny Elfman lacks any memorable hooks while being drowned out by a soundtrack that includes Barry White, the Moody Blues, and Alice Cooper, who cameos as himself.

The weak story means the actors have to work that much harder. Michelle Pfeiffer, who hasn't worked with Burton since Batman Returns, gives a strong performance as do Jonny Lee Miller and Helena Bonham Carter, but none of their characters are fleshed out enough. Chloe Moretz is good as the sullen teenager with a deadpan delivery reminiscent of Christina Ricci in The Addams Family. Johnny Depp gives another quirky performance as the immortal vampire with the chalk white face and elongated fingers ala Max Schreck in Nosferatu. Eva Green is perfectly cast as the sultry witch Angelique and she's easily the highlight of Dark Shadows. Green plays it big in a sexy, over-the-top manner befitting the film's soap opera roots.

It may be time for Tim Burton and Johnny Depp to call a break, or, at least, devote their time to an original concept rather than an adaptation or remake. Dark Shadows pales in comparison to their past work. Dark Shadows has a hard time deciding if it wants to be a gothic romance, a dark drama, or a slapstick comedy and it fails at every instance.

Rating: ** (*****)

The Avengers

The Avengers - Dir. Joss Whedon (2012)

"You think you're the only superhero in the world? Mr. Stark, you've become a part of a bigger universe…I'm here to talk to you about the Avenger Initiative.

Back in 2008, moviegoers patient enough to sit through the end credits of Iron Man heard those fateful words. Marvel Comics laid out the foundation for a shared cinematic universe that would bring to life some of their most iconic creations. Marvel was doing the unprecedented by launching their characters into their own franchises while building to one uber-franchise in The Avengers. Though it's been five years in the making, it seems like a comic book fans have been waiting a lifetime for Marvel's premiere super-team (sorry, X-Men) to finally arrive. Iron Man director Jon Favreau was given first dibs, but couldn't reconcile how to unite such disparate personalities. Luckily, Marvel found their man in Joss Whedon, the creator of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Firefly. He's also had previous experience working for Marvel as the writer of Astonishing X-Men and The Runaways. Indeed, his geek credibility made him a popular choice with the notoriously picky fanbase.

Be warned, The Avengers may be difficult to follow if you haven't seen the previous films. It wastes no time in kicking off the plot.

When last we left him, the Norse god of mischief, Loki (Tom Hiddleston), plummeted into the never-ending abyss of space. Rescued by a mysterious cosmic puppet master, Loki arrives on Earth seeking the Tesseract. With it, he hopes to open a portal to transport an alien race known as the Chitauri to conquer the world. SHIELD Director Nick Fury (Samuel L. Jackson) gathers together the only force capable of stopping him, the Avengers, comprised of Iron Man (Robert Downey Jr.), Captain America (Chris Evans), Thor (Chris Hemsworth), the Hulk (Mark Ruffalo), the Black Widow (Scarlett Johansson), and Hawkeye (Jeremy Renner). Loki's job may be easier than he imagined since none of the heroes can get along.

The Avengers is exactly the type of widescreen action expected from a big-budget summer blockbuster.  Fanboys will drool at the chance to watch Iron Man clash with Thor, the SHIELD Helicarrier lifting into the air, and the Hulk attempting (and failing) to lift Mjolnir. The third act of the film features a spectacular battle as alien invaders lay waste to midtown Manhattan. While the idea of extraterrestrials flooding through a portal into a crowded city is reminiscent of Transformers: Dark of the Moon, Whedon is able to craft an exciting action sequences in a way Michael Bay never will. It's not just visual noise and empty spectacle, but a thrilling series of mini-battles. Thor and Cap fighting back-to-back as hammer and shield fly back and forth. Iron Man and Cap tag teaming against the Chitauri with the Armored Avenger bouncing his repulsor rays off the Sentinel of Liberty's shield. Whedon even breaks out a tracking shot done in one uninterrupted take that rivals the intro from Serenity. The camera glides through the air and up the side of a skyscraper as it follows each of the Avengers in their struggles. Most importantly, Whedon makes sure you are emotionally invested in every character.

The majority of superhero films make the mistake of bogging down the narrative with too many characters and The Avengers could have fallen into that habit. But, Whedon is no stranger to working with a large ensemble and nearly everyone brings something unique to the table. No doubt, Robert Downey Jr. is one of the highlights of The Avengers, his quick-witted demeanor is the perfect match for Whedon's jokey, pop culture infused sensibilities. As Tony Stark, Downey gets off some of the funniest lines from calling Thor "Point Break" to pointing out a SHIELD agent is secretly playing Galaga. Iron Man is the most well-known and most successful of the heroes and there was a danger that The Avengers would devolve into the Iron Man Show. Instead, Whedon finds the right balance and plays everyone else (especially the straight-laced Cap) against Stark's snarky demeanor. It's also nice to see Gwyneth Paltrow for a little while as Pepper Potts, especially when she's padding around Tony's penthouse barefoot and in jean shorts.

Chris Evans gives his best performance yet as Captain America. Much like Ryan Reynolds, Evans was known more as a good-looking guy able to pull off comedic roles, but lacking dramatic chops. Unlike Reynolds' flat turn as Green Lantern, Evans gives Cap the pathos of a man, who has lost his family and friends after spending seventy years on ice. He possesses a commanding presence that makes you believe he can bark orders at his teammates and they will follow without question. Cap really is the heart of the film. 

Mark Ruffalo takes over the role of Bruce Banner from Edward Norton. Ruffalo is credited by many critics and fans as giving the best interpretation of Hulk/Banner yet and it's hard to disagree. Here, Banner isn't on a quixotic quest to find a cure, but has embraced a fatalistic acceptance of his curse as the Hulk. Ruffalo is warmer and fuzzier than Norton and brings a dry wit. He shares some fantastic scenes with Downey. As Banner and Stark, they are the two smartest guys on the planet and you can tell they enjoy finally being in the company of an intellectual equal. The Hulk, meanwhile, is the unstoppable engine of destruction and the source of two great punchlines.

Whedon manages to make the Black Widow even more interesting here than her appearance in Iron Man 2. This shouldn't be surprising as Whedon is the master at writing strong female characters. He hints at an intriguing backstory to the former KGB assassin with only a handful of scenes. Unfortunately, her counterpart, Hawkeye, doesn't get anything meaty to do until the final act. Still, Whedon makes you believe a girl with a gun and a guy who shoots arrows belong on the team. Then, there's Clark Gregg as Agent Coulson, who has been the glue uniting the film series. He's mostly been a run-of-the-mill man in black. In Avengers, Coulson is humanized as a giddy admirer of Captain America, gladly bragging about his complete set of vintage Cap trading cards. They are in near mint condition, except for some "slight foxing around the edges."

As Thor, Chris Hemsworth doesn't get as much screen time as his co-stars, but he does give another solid performance as the god of thunder. His "brother," Tom Hiddleston, has a lot more scenes and he chews them up every chance he gets. Loki isn't as nuanced here and he's given a lot of corny supervillain dialogue ("I am burdened with glorious purpose") Yet, Hiddleston is a good enough actor to make it work.

The Avengers isn't a perfect film. There are weaknesses if you search hard enough for them. Though he's revealed to be more of a shady manipulator, Samuel L. Jackson's Nick Fury hasn't grown much since his initial cameo and Jackson is somewhat stiff. Marvel also introduces How I Met Your Mother's Cobie Smulders as Fury's second-in-command, Maria Hill. Unfortunately, she's not given much to do other than spout exposition or have exposition spouted to her. The opening prologue doesn't exemplify the greatness that would come later. It's a clunky beginning with some stiff dialogue. The alien menaces aren't the most compelling villains and are only there as cannon fodder for the Avengers. It's obvious they needed something for the good guys to fight without taking away too much screen time or too much demand from the audience. The score by Alan Silvestri is generic and slightly disappointing after his excellent work on Captain America: The First Avenger. The Avengers was going out for a memorable score in the vein of John Williams' theme for Superman or Danny Elfman's Batman theme.

In Joss, we trust. The Avengers isn't just the best Marvel movie made thus far. It's the best comic book ever and one of the best blockbusters in recent memory. Whedon brings the action and his trademark knack for lively dialogue and unexpected twists. Marvel has accomplished an incredible feat and I cannot wait for the next series of movies. Maybe then, we can finally hear the war cry of "Avengers assemble."

Rating: **** ½ (*****)